Recently, I got viral on brazilian Tiktok - just for the wrong "For You" page. The algorythim showed my video to normie people, can you imagine the disgrace?
From water to wine I started receiving hundreds of likes, and also much hate in the comments. So I would like to address it here a little.
Let's talk about my hate audience, composed of young women, ranged maybe from 15 to their late 30's. There were a few man too, maybe half a dozen? They reminded me of those boys that in my student days were the class' terrorists, who would bully and torment everyone's lifes. But they were few compared with the hundreds of women shaming me. Women that were the latest brazilian standart: very thick square edged eyebrows, straightened hair, wearing a cropped top and short skirt/shorts, posing with a duck face for a mirror - no, I'm not shaming them for it, I'm just picturing the type so you can have an idea.
These women made a choir of monotone comments, who would range from "(lord) have mercy", "oh lord", "eww", and sometimes they would get (a little bit) creative saying something along the lines I'm crazy to wear children clothes - yeah ma'am, children would spend $2000 dollars in a coord, sit there Claudia.
I would like deeply to understand why some women find delight in shaming other women - for what they wear, what they do, who they choose to be with, their hobbies... I've seen less men shaming women than women themselves. And the best part is that what goes around comes around, so while you are shaming someone for wearing """""children clothes"""" (that btw are not meant for children in first place), maybe you are being shamed for being "too slutty", "too appealing for men", "too promiscuous", while you think you are in the norm of what someone should be wearing in this historic period.
"Dressing different is a crime", internet police says
Yesterday I came across these news: this woman in the picture is a famous actress in Brazil, Grazi Massafera. She were spotted in the mall with her daughter, who was wearing this outfit you are seeing in this photo. Normal clothes, right? For women in general not, because they started to bully the girl online for wearing "not appropriated clothes for a mall", for "dressing bad", and I even saw an interview with a woman passing by, where she was asked about what does she think about it and she said "the girl needed to wear a cropped top". That's the level of absurdity we are living today. If this is a "strange oufit", can you imagine the heart stroke they had when they noticed I'm alive? Shocking.
We as women are so judged by society, and what's worse, for other women. Sometimes I would love to study psychology to understand why someone stops what they are doing in their own lives to point their fingers to other person and judge and laugh. That maybe must be insecurity, and while they point out how someone is strange, more (they think!) they are the norm, the right ones, the God's choosen, bla bla bla. Maybe that's a form of distorted self affirmation, like, "look how I am not strange, how I am normal and boring, now worship me", some kind of this bullshit. Sometimes I would like to study psychology too to understand why someone sees someone who dresses different and must insert some psychological problem to justify that person's behavior -"ooh she must have a trauma!" - just because someone is wearing pink. Blasting news for you: we all have traumas, Karen, nobody passes the childhood unharmed - if you really knew a little about psychology you would know, as well as that no professional is abled to make a psychological diagnostic of someone based on a photo or what they are wearing, duh. The best part is, we only need to have psychological counselling if we are dressing strange; if we take the clothes off and wear a cropped top, wow, we are cured, oh glory! Can I hear an Amen?
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Keep the strange movement alive!
I think that it is very funny - and funny maybe is not the best word to use - how more and more our society kills individuality. Lately I've been trying to use my hair curly, and every place I go people mock me because my curly hair - offense for free. Yeah, a curly hair is making people so uncomfortable that they need to let me know it, in the most unpleasant way possible. We have to be robots with the perfect bodies and the perfect thick square edged eyebrows, with the most straight hair possible, and our prize is approval, nothing more than that. And that I must say, is a fake approval, because you are always going to get criticized. Too fat, too skinny, too housewife, too whore, too saint, too devil, as if the world was just a binary yes or no, and not the actual 50 shades of gray that it is where everyone is fucked up.
That lack of individuality and the imposing of the norm - uniform - for everyone really reminds me why japanese alternative street fashion (and in that meatloaf we can include lolita fashion) were born. In Japan, people have to have the same haircuts on school, the same clothes, the same bag, the same shoes, the same pencils (no kawaii pencils are allowed in many schools), many times foreign people with different hair colors, e.g. blonde, have to dye their hair black. You grow up, from the school to work, where everyone has to wear uniform. And from work to casket. Where is the time for individuality? If it depends of the society, there isn't time for it. So, I find it so beautiful how japanese youth, in their free time, decided to wear whatever that made them happy, and because of this now we have that legacy that are the kawaii fashions. If someone in the 90's didn't woke up with courage enough to defy the society roles, we would not have Lolita Fashion today. That's so crazy.
I think we should keep wearing alternative fashion and whatever makes us happy, for us and for the next generations; With all this uniform thing going around, the more we stand against the society norms, the more we hold a door for the next generations be able to wear whatever they want to. We must normalize that being yourself is the normal, and not whatever trend people want to shove down our throats. And for those who said we need a psychologist because we wear cute clothes, I hope yours are up to date, because you are needing it so bad.
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